My children..grandchildren and their grandchildren will still reap the benefits of what I will create.
So I’m going through a rough phase. Broke and stuck. There’s so much ideas and excitements worth pursuing but financial instability keeps me stuck. Now this situation is so cruel that it wants to eat up my confidence I have in my visions for great success.
This situation is good. You should be tested thoroughly before you claim that you deserve any success. If you let your situation feed your fear with your confidence… It’s the best proof that you are not ready to deserve success just yet.
You go to sleep with so much insecurities and selfdoubts..morning you wake up..the first thing, ask yourself if this journey is worth pursuing… Is it all worth it. If the answer is a big YES..you are on the right track. If you are in doubt, you are off the track.
I get the big YES every morning and that keeps me moving forward. Not sure what lays ahead…
So I used to keep my room and surrounding always clean …if something is not clean around me, my topmost priority will be to cleanup the mess and move on to other things. In the past few years this has become just the opposite… My room is always untidy and no matter how good I clean it (after a week or two)..next day it’s back to being untidy. Have I grown sick of cleaning up my room!? I wondered.
My brain came up with a justification that seems to justify this situation so very well…! Each individual has a “cleanliness freak bandwidth” …when it’s being sucked up by other important tasks…the itch of being surrounded by a messy room sounds perfectly alright suddenly. Clearly I’m running out of my “cleanliness freak bandwidth” …I’m still fixing mess around more important stuff and my room doesn’t seem very important when compared.
Finally I can stop wondering about my behaviour and sleep in a messy room more peacefully 😛